As we continue the conversation on the importance of developing relational equity and examine organizations and individuals who experience seasons where they flourish, we can draw some conclusions as to why these blessings occur. Should you decide to hop on the bus with us today, we are going to explore one rule from Jon Gordon and Ken Blanchard’s 10 Rules to Fuel Your Life, Work, and Team with Positive Energy.

If you are leading an organization, a team, or just yourself, there are valuable lessons to learn and we start with the statement, “You can take the wheel and choose to create your life, one thought, one belief, one action, one choice at a time. It’s your bus and you’re the driver and you choose where you are going and the kind of ride it’s going to be…The energy you fuel the ride of your life with is entirely up to you.”

In life, the people surrounding us matter a great deal as we discuss in Who’s in Your Posse? because they influence our thoughts, our actions, and our attitudes. Personally, surrounding myself with friends and colleagues who will uplift, encourage, and genuinely support me can sway where I am located on the continuum between flourishing to floundering in personal, professional, and spiritual matters. And if am forced to narrow my list of priorities where investments are being made in creating relational equity, I am likely to choose riders on my bus who increase my energy and productivity rather than those who drain it.

So, we return to the title question of this post, “Are You an Energy Vampire?” Admit it, you immediately visualized in your mind the type of person that Gordon and Blanchard describe as vampires. Or if another person did not come to mind, you might need to ask if other people visualize you? Who is that person that seems to suck the life out of every meeting, idea, and vision that is expressed? In Rule #6, Gordon and Blanchard, state, “Post a Sign That Says NO ENERGY VAMPIRES ALLOWED on your bus…We need a positive and supportive team and whoever is negative will be kicked off the bus or left at the station.”

Now, please understand that these authors are not discussing those instrumental people on your team that help navigate potential accidents by wisely addressing the locations of guardrails and road flares. Instead the authors caution against those individuals full of negativity that stalls forward progress by creating a drain on time, energy, and resources.  Unfortunately, we have likely all experienced incidents where “you have an Energy Vampire on your bus like a boss or someone you can’t kick off. You have to deal with them”…but keep in mind that “positive energy is like a muscle. The more you use it, the stronger it gets. The stronger it gets, the more powerful you become.”

I’m not sure if it’s just a coincidence that Ronna Lichtenberg’s principle is also #6 where she mirrors the concept of energy vampires in her book It’s Not Business, It’s Personal. She addresses energy vampires by stating, “Don’t waste time on the wrong people.” Vampires to her are the “ones who make your heart drop when you see their number appear on your caller ID…a person who makes you tired every time they walk in the room. They just drain the life and enthusiasm out of every situation.”

I’m deeply sorry if God has purposed you with investing in an energy vampire, especially if they are a family member, but when given a choice, either leave those riders at the station or use Humble Inquiry while Listening Well to ask them to please step off your bus.

Please feel free to share comments below in successful strategies for dealing with the Energy Vampires in your life. How does God equip us to lovingly step away from those relationships that drain us away from the productivity He has called us to accomplish?