My friends Fran and Angela produce a podcast entitled Rambling Through Everyday Life that is both enjoyable and insightful; and today, I might offer that Christie and Julie have a similar, albeit different take, as we engage in an unpublished version of “Walking Through Everyday Life.” During our summer morning strolls, we discuss anything and everything while attempting to address life’s mysteries and any topic is open for debate. Just this past week, our conversation managed to navigate its way into the topic of the love language known as Aggravation.

Now, I am certain that this unique display of love will not be found in the discerning works of Gary Chapman; however, in the lives of two Southern Gen Xers, Aggravation is a mainstay in our lives for expressing adoration to our friends and family; because the reality is that being Fully Known and Loved in our circles means you will be playfully picked on, not in a malicious and destructive way (we hope), but in a way that communicates we know you extremely well and find humor in teasing your quirkiness.

The genesis of this Aggravation conversation was connected to the sharing of my recent excitement of returning from a fun work week in Campers on Mission where there is often a teasing back-and-forth between myself and other members as we work, or often, wait for work assignments. Whether it’s Eve’s comment to me (referencing the age of our membership), “If you’re going to author a book, you might want to get started. Some of us don’t have as long to wait as others;” or my request to Doug, after catching him sitting in the auditorium with nail clippers, “What time is my manicure tomorrow?”, any witnesses to this bantering will hopefully feel the love lingering behind this teasing.

After sharing my love of quick-witted friends who tease well, Christie offered how immensely sad she was to longer have the opportunity to engage in Aggravation with her aunt Linda, who passed away in December. That was one of the hallmarks of their love for each other, Christie could always push Linda’s buttons and receive a reaction. Because Linda was also one of my mentors during student teaching, (way back in the day), I have witnessed this loving relationship between aunt and niece many times over the years. This bantering between family members has mirrored many of my own relationships whether with relatives or friends. We recognize how to push each other’s buttons because we have intimately experienced life Side-by-Side—mistakes, highlights, and everything in-between!

Personally, engaging in the love language of Aggravation serves as a measurement that you and I have likely developed some Relational Equity between us. We’ve struggled through life together, providing needed support during heartaches. We’ve painted too many rooms at The King’s Academy together. We’ve found creative solutions to cutting slits into tennis balls with a table saw. Or perhaps we spent too many late nights documenting statistics at NAIA basketball games. We’ve witnessed the highs and lows of life and found humor, which allows us to cope, within the unique love language known as Aggravation. I am genuinely in anguish if your life is absent of Tuesday People who are permitted to be sassy, smart aleck, and impertinent with you at appropriate times. Now, I apologize for any past or future timing mistakes in my loving Aggravation, but confidently know that the love and adoration is genuine, or else I wouldn’t bother. I would even dare to offer that our Smiling Jesus even bantered back and forth with His disciples from time to time. He knew them well, and since He was a Never-Failing Friend, He had the advantage of never timing His humor poorly.

Do you recall a person or incident where you experienced the love language of Aggravation? Please consider sharing in the comments below.