How in the world do I find myself Here Again? Again in this place of uncertainty, of feeling Stuck In-Between two options, of desiring answers to Big Questions that may never come, struggling to keep my eyes on Him and my nose in His Word, yet needing to make tangible decisions that have long-lasting implications. I’m supposed to be serving as the Wrestling Coach guiding college students through these labors, not tussling with them myself. Yet, here I am, seeking direction, pondering how to make the best decisions, longing to experience the peace that can only be found in the arms of my Lord and Savior. Again!

So, Here Again I sit, considering the advice from people much wiser than myself. Fenelon advises to “take entire days just to withdraw and be alone with God. It is at the feet of Jesus that all the wounds of the heart are healed and all the soil of the world is wiped away.” Andy considers what it might be like to, in the words of a country song, “have a [beverage] with Jesus,” so that we might ask Him to help us understand. Ashlee’s suggestion is to turn the volume up on the praise music and just let His Spirit fill my soul. Angela offers wisdom on how to reframe the thoughts running through my mind. Nehemiah wept, mourned, fasted, and prayed.

Perhaps, the best solution is some combination of these wise suggestions, so as I withdraw to be alone with God, I ask Him to come and sit with me, and sing the lyrics to Here Again as a request from the bottom of my heart, asking God, “Will you meet me Here Again?” And He does, like He’s done before, whether I’m in the Jeep driving down the interstate, on the bed in my room, or standing in an arena at a women’s conference. He fills me with His presence where I can truly say, “The Lord is in this place. The Lord is in this place.” Because He is in my heart, no matter where I am geographically located or where I might be in a specific Season of Life. He proves that He’s Here Again and always will be.

There is a great deal of uncertainty about the days that are ahead, but I’m trying to rest in Him, inviting His presence through Lifelines like these: “Let your love rise above every fear/Like the sun shaping the shadow/In my weakness Your glory appears/I’m not enough unless You come/Will you meet me Here Again?/Come Holy Spirit, dry bones awaken/The Lord is in this place/The Lord is in this place.” One commenter on the YouTube video of Lydia Laird’s version of the song says, “Only when you go through something deep in your life, then a song like this has an even deeper meaning…love the lyrics.”

I’ve yet to arrive at the answers I’m seeking, but I know that I will find them, and I will continue to invite God to meet me Here Again, and again, and again, knowing that eventually He will provide the Holy Confidence I need to make the appropriate decisions. Perhaps there is a song whose lyrics speak to you deeply in times of frustration. Would you consider sharing in the comments below?

References:

Brown, C., Furlick, S. & Corbett, A.M. (2020). Here again. [Recorded by Lydia Laird]. On Lydia Laird. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=55cnWOfIBlk&t=1s

Fenelon. (1992). The seeking heart. SeedSowers Publishing. pp. 18-20.

Watson, A. (2011). Awakened: Change your mindset to transform your teaching. [Kindle version]. Due Season Press.