“Where are your Corner Four fueling stations?” This inquiry is asked of readers by Henry Cloud in The Power of the Other. Asked in a different manner, who are the people that provide you with the energy or growth that refuels the pursuit of your God-given purpose? If you were asked to conduct a relationship audit today, who would be the Energy Vampires that suck the life out of every meeting, idea, and vision that we learned about from Jon Gordon and Kenneth Blanchard in The Energy Bus? Who in your life is leading you towards a Habit of Awareness and Growth and who might be steering you in the wrong direction?

To help us understand the importance of Corner Four Relationships and the role they play in providing us energy and growth, Cloud describes the hormonal process that our bodies use to regulate our energy. “Insulin functioning changes your glucose levels; then your thinking, energy, behavior, and a host of other performance drivers are affected as well. That’s why athletes refuel themselves. The brain, the physical equipment, is a huge part of all of our functioning. But it’s not all there is. Second, there is relationship, our interpersonal connections and our experiences in those connections.” It’s the relational equity which has been invested both in us, from others, and through us, into others, that allows us to grow and develop personally, professionally, and spiritually.

One of the points Cloud emphasizes when encouraging us to maintain healthy fuel levels that can only emerge out of Corner Four Relationships, is the fact that “many times we confuse this issue. We think that the real and genuinely supportive relationships of Corner Four deal only in happy thoughts and are always ‘positive.’ They are positive in their intent and desired result, but sometimes there is a lot of negative stuff that is talked about. If we’re not getting it or not performing in some way, our Corner Four people sometimes have to wake us up and be pretty tough. They have to say some hard things, which sometimes hurt to hear.” Because of the need we have for authentic relationships that assist us in becoming our best self, I encourage emerging adults to conduct the relationship audit and open themselves up to opportunities for connections with mentors who will be honest even when it’s not what we desire to hear.

Although this post, and most anything I write, focuses on connections with people currently in our lives, the mentoring model I propose allows room for us to learn from those we may not personally know. At the conclusion of a presentation on the model at the 2019 2^nd Congress for Sport and Christianity, a colleague posed the relevant question, “Is there room in your model for dead people?” My immediate answer was, “Yes!” after I erased the quote from the movie The Sixth Sense from my mind. We can learn valuable lessons from Scripture, authors, pastors…people both alive and dead, people we know personally and those we know of from afar, especially in a world where resources are just a click away! It’s vital we don’t dismiss even a single conversation that might serve as a Fueling Station.

Are you ready to identify where the Fueling Stations are in your life? If the examples above did not provide you a clear image of the importance of knowing fuel locations, just take a road trip with my dad and you are guaranteed that all diesel stations and prices will be identified along your route! (Love you, Dad!) Please feel free to share a comment about Fueling Stations in your life in the area below.

References:

Cloud, H. (2016). Power of the other: The startling effect other people have on you, from the boardroom to the bedroom and beyond-and what to do about it. Harper Business.

Gordon, J. & Blanchard, K. (2009). The energy bus: 10 Rules to Fuel Your Life, Work, and Team with Positive Energy. Wiley Publishers.http://jongordon.com/