Part of my career story started in high school sports, which led to a college scholarship, where I continued honing my sport management skills for the women’s basketball and baseball teams. But because I was not an athlete taking the court, there were many times when a question was posed to me that my reply included some variation of “Oh, I’m not a player, I’m Only the manager.” Perhaps I was cautious and used that caveat so that no one expected me to be able to shoot as efficiently as the well-respected players in our successful program; however, recent reading has me pondering not only the times when I have uttered I’m Only, but how frequently others, especially women, use this phrase too.

Consider times you may have used the I’m Only phrase…I’m Only a volunteer…I’m Only a friend here watching these kids play…I’m Only an assistant…or other variations include I’m Just a mom…I’m Just a teacher…I Just stock shelves…I Just watch children. But what occurs when we approach a responsibility with this mindset is a lessening of the talents and gifts that God gave us. Without fulfilling my duties as a manager, there would have been no newspaper stories, there would have been no establishing of records, there would have been no fodder for the broadcasters, so why did I feel the need to explain with an I’m Only?

In Ready to Rise, Jo Saxton reminds us, “Our Creator, our heavenly Father, the ultimate parent, has lavished on us a generous, wide range of incredible gifts, talents, skills, and abilities…Just and only can sometimes make us believe our contributions are insignificant or inadequate…Your gifts and abilities are not accidents; they are gifts from your Creator, who already saw you as valuable and worthy.” Our culture is the one approaching our talents with a limiting mindset and trying to break free from this thinking is a challenge. “Dee Dee Myers once reflected, ‘I am endlessly fascinated that playing football is considered a training ground for leadership, but raising children isn’t’ [Referring to the I’m Only a mom statement]. There are the gifts that are like seeds waiting to be sown, ideas and dreams embedded in our hearts and minds that will take time to unfold and need our attention. But the fact that we don’t know all the details and how it will all work out can be intimidating.”

Emerging Adults are especially vulnerable to being intimidated by not knowing how God might use them and their talents in the future. Instead of confidently leading a small group or taking on leadership responsibilities, their mindset says, “I’m Only in my twenties. I can’t do that.” In his book Work, Dan Doriani shares the message that I desire so deeply for not only college students to hear, but for all of those people who ever doubt their worth. “When you begin to recognize the aspects of your vocation that can honor God, then you see that all kinds of work possess qualities of dignity—not just the jobs of preachers or presidents, and not just those of CEOs and surgeons. God is calling the cop and the carpenter and the concrete layer to experience the dignity of their work as he uses their jobs to help others, improve lives, and spread the influence of his kingdom in the world—in the skills they express, in the products they make, in the way they work, in the impact of their labors on society, and in the relationships affected by their work.”

Personally, I want to challenge myself to be cautious about using the I’m Only phrasing because I know how easy it is to allow myself to think, “I’m Only a blogger, not a real writer, or I’m Just a professor, I’m not a researcher!” If we claim the desire to have a flourishing life, then limiting statements like these should be removed from our thinking and speaking. God promises in John 10 the abundant life–no limits, no qualifying statements. Will you join me in encouraging others, especially Emerging Adults, to embrace removing the I’m Only thinking from our minds so we can all flourish personally, professionally, and spiritually?

References:

Doriani, D.M. (2019). Work: It’s purpose, dignity, and transformation. P&R Publishing.

Saxton, J. (2020). Ready to rise: Own your voice, gather your community, step into your influence. Waterbrook.